I feel your pain with the car as I had the same experience you did aside from dying in it. I actually wrecked the car because of the lag and knew that I had to replace parts on it to get it running again. The problem was, by the time I got back to the car with the parts (about an hour), the car despawned on me.

You spawn with a road flare as it is which is plenty bright. That lasts you long enough to build a torch. This game is about survival

Never enter the car unless it has 4 wheels on it. Risking your life. Has happened to tons of people.